Mother's Day in the Aging Family- Tips for Gifts

Mother’s Day is coming up on May 10. One of those ritual holidays that aging families can really celebrate - here’s what you do can make Mom feel extra special. These ceremonial holidays can mean so much more when parents are older.

Bringing the grandchildren into the celebration is a lovely gift in itself .
Handmade cards from grandkids is a top drawer present. . You can have the young artists mail their colorful greetings or think of giving Mom a My Celery My Celery to deliver the message. This is an easy 2 way computer free e-mail where the grandchildren can e mail grandma a greeting for mothers day- or any day they want. It just comes out of a fax in Grandma’s home and works with any fax she may already have.

Another wonderful product is Presto, a printing mailbox that prints e-mails and attachments. You can scan your 4 year olds terrific cards (kids art is the greatest) and e mail Grandma as an attachment . Preso - the card comes out of a fax you either buy her a gift for mother’s day or she has one already.

You could all make a big sign to tack somewhere in Mom’s home saying “Happy Mother’s Day.” A homemade gift is really a bonus for grandma or Mom . In economic times like these, handcrafted gifts are penny wise. On top of not being pound foolish , grandmothers probably like the care a handcrafted gift just radiates.

If your kids or you are arty make a mobile for Mom /grandmom. Attach cutouts of items she loves most like her cat, photos of the grandkids or her favorite food.( mine would be chocolate covered cherries.)

Give coffee cups with grandchildren’s pictures on them, you can order from Kodak or Snapfish. When they were little, my daughter made simple prints of my grandchildren’s hands and framed them with an inexpensive frame.

Technology is a savvy gift to give for mom or Grandmother. CEIVA® Digital Photo Frame is a digital photo frame that is connected to a telephone or DSL line. It can be placed in Mom’s residence. Long-distance family members, or even local family members, can upload photos to the frame at any time from their own computers if they subscribe to the PicturePlan® service. Your mom can wake up to different family photos every day, and relatives from all over can send them as well.

Here is a brilliant idea from Julie Menack’s chapter on long-distance care providers, in my new book Care Managers and the Aging Family (Jones and Bartlett), 2008. If you are long-distance caregiver and cannot visit on holidays, Barbara Friesner of AgeWise Living suggests that that you might want to send a holiday in a box.

This is a fun way to share the holidays, particularly if the care recipient resides in assisted living or a nursing home. All ages in the family can participate in communicating with your mom through the contents of the box.. A mother’s day package might include a sign saying “Happy Mother’s Day” that you or your family make or buy. It could include candy if your mom can eat that—maybe her favorite kind.

If you can’t send flowers, include silk or plastic flowers in the mother's day box. Have the grandchildren make an old-fashioned wrist corsage out of paper flowers. Call the facility and ask if you can get gift certificate for her to get her hair done. Find out if they are having a brunch to celebrate Mother’s Day, and make sure your mom can attend. Buy her a new dress for the event and put it in the package. Have your children or grandchildren make individual handmade cards.

Set up a time for a phone call that is good for both of you. If possible, call in the morning or early evening when your mom may be feeling lonely. And, of course, make sure everything arrives well in advance.

Warning Signs on Mother’s Day

If you can go and see Mom in person on Mother’s Day, you can check up on your aging mother’s safety while you are there. Sometimes, during your visits, you may hear alarm bells, like piles of junk mail or consistently dirty clothes. Below is a list to take with you when you go to Mom’s house on Mother’s Day, or any holiday. If you do find worrisome signs, this is a good time to call a geriatric care manager to assess your mother. To find a great GCM go to National Association of Professional Geriatric Care Managers.

Clutter in the house
Unpaid bills
Evidence of missed appointments, getting lost, or wandering
Weight loss
Poor grooming



Have a happy Mother’s Day!